Some of you may or may not know that I’m a poker baller
I started out hustling 7 card stud games in 2003-2004, then played and made quite a few final tables on tourneys at my local poker club the Gutshot in London. I even won some flights to Vegas and an entry to a $2000 event. Oh yeah.
Recently though, I’ve even done well against some big names in the poker community.
I played Serkules (currently ranked number 1 hyper heads up player in the world) — we played out of 11 games and I won 6-3. (We didn’t have to finish, as I won more than half already)
Also I tied Daniel Cates (aka the Jungleman) out of 10 tourneys….
But that’s enough bragging ;)
After my 10 games of heads-up poker against Dan – who if you ask me – is the best heads up player in the world – we had a bit of a chat. If you don’t know Mr Cates – He’s beaten Patrick Antonius, Tom Dwan, Phil Ivey, and all the other “world-class” players. So he really is world class.
I thought I would share some of my thoughts on this topic with ya’ll.
Now, what made it an interesting discussion was the fact that we’re both experts in our fields, and we both know about the other.
I’m no poker pro, but I can hold my own. Generally if I get heads-up in a tourney, I almost always win.
Anywho: Daniel was telling me, that a lot of the most famous poker players, are not actually the best ones–just the most famous. Just like in the PUA world – the most best dating coaches I know are some of the least well know…. and many of the most famous are actually crap with women. They’re just marketing dudes making bank.
Daniel asked me what the characteristics were to become excellent with women. I asked him the same question about what it would take to become a world-class poker player, and it turned out our answers were very similar. Skill was just one component, also mentioned were perseverance, effort, beliefs, and downright dedication. Fortunately, bankroll management was not a necessity for pickup! Anyways, I thought I’d write a bit about these qualities and how they are important for the aspiring playboy, or poker superstar……
I’d say the main skill you need to kill it in either poker or PUA is patience. You absolutely MUST put in a lot of time to get these skill set down. Sure, everyone wants to just be awesome right away, but that’s not how this shit works. It took me years to really get good with women, and to understand the things that make me who I am now. To really internalize the lessons that make me killer – took a long fucking time. Sure, some people are more talented that others – but ultimately you need to work your ass off if you want to get amazing. Same thing for poker- it’s the guys who’ve spend months and years playing thousands of hands (hundreds of thousands and MILLIONS even with online poker) that are killing it today. There’s just no way around it. If you don’t have the patience, PUA or POKER ain’t for you.
Yeah, you don’t often read articles about “guts” but…. I’ll tell you what: You gotta have guts to make it in either of these areas. If you don’t approach a woman – you can’t get her. If you’re too scared to make a play at a pot – you can’t win it. Interestingly, guts CAN be developed. Just cuz you’re born a bitch, doesn’t mean you have to stay one. You need to start taking chances and get comfortable with it to really grow a pair. That means approaching those sexy ladies out there if you’re in PUA – and it means taking more shots at pots if you’re trying to make it as a poker player.
Yeah, fortitude is a funny word. But, you gotta have it to make it. When you’re trying to get good with the ladies – you’re going to get rejected, told to fuck off, ignored. You may even have a drink or two poured on you if you’re unlucky (or un-calibrated) enough. You name it – BRUTAL!
If you’re trying to make it as a poker pro – you’re going to be out drawn, go on unlucky streaks – go completely bankrupt loosing EVERYTHING you have. Just as brutal!! In poker, PUA, and LIFE – The ability to take a kicking, get up, and keep on going is a must. If you can’t take the heat – you can just quit the game right now. You’ll never get good unless you can take the rough patches. Personally, all the best guys in the world in pick-up circles got their ass kicked (including me) before seeing results. I went out for YEARS on end, talking to 1000’s of girls before I really started to get anywhere. Unfortunately, good looks aren’t too useful in the poker world – otherwise I’d be a millionaire! :D
It’s the most important element of really improving yourself, is recognizing your own faults, seeking out your of weaknesses, and destroying them. Einstein defined insanity as “Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” Unfortunately, too much of this goes in the PUA world. I’ve run into guys who’ve been stuck on the SAME level for months or YEARS making no progress. That’s fucked up. Know any poker players that have holes in their game? Keep loosing money? Guess what – they’re doing the same insane behavior too. I’d say that honest self-reflection – truly seeking to know yourself–both in poker, and pick up–is the most critical ingredient in achieving success. Without being honest with yourself, unless you’re a natural talent, your progress in these areas will be extremely limited.. or you might end up having to fold – permanently.I suspect the same is true for all areas.
- Bonus Characteristic: CreativityHere’s an interesting one. You don’t have to be creative in these two areas, but I’d say it’s something that will make you REALLY good in both if you are. Sure, you can have your standard Pick-up strategy and it may very well work – but stepping outside the zone and getting creative will skyrocket your interactions with women – and will certainly get you paid on the poker table. You can sit there and play like a rock – but people will figure you out and you’re not going to get paid. I’m not saying play like a maniac all the time, but getting funky, and making plays your opponents don’t expect will keep their on the toes and give you a big advantage.So, if you’re sticking to the sames moves a lot – experiment. Get out of your comfort zone, get creative, and see how far out of your comfort zone you can get and succeed. You may find yourself getting greater results than you’d have expected!
Whether you’re seeking more bounty (or more booty,) or both….
Whether you’re an aspiring game player or an expert…
I hope this article has shown the importance of these key characteristics, and will pave the way for you to achieve your goals – and more! In all honesty: It’s not just about PUA or poker success – these ingredients are crucial for life and should be developed no matter what field you’re in. You either want to kick ass or you don’t. But if you’re reading this – I already know you’re here to kick ass :)
Hope this helped! ;)
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