So, last night I met up with this hot Chinese girl I’d met on Sept 28th (check past blog entry)
Judging by her responsiveness in texts it was apparent it was on even before we met up. She’d flaked once before but I guess she just couldn’t make it that time. She always replied right away, and would let me know when she was in town etc though I was always busy and couldn’t meet up in the few slots she could meet up (She has a very full schedule too) .
I noticed that we actually bonded a bit over the fact that we were both so busy. If any of you guys meet a girl who’s just too busy to meet up just act like you are equally or more busy. For me, it was 100% genuine. Between teaching, organising the DirectDatingSummit and comedy, AND women, AND working out – I’m fucking SWAMPED.
But yea comments like “god we’re both so busy, it’s amazing we ever met up!” went down really well. Good rapport building. Also, this will keep any of you fuckers from getting frustrated if a girl is genuinely busy. If you have that frame too you’ll just be like “yea I know what it’s like! We’ll get our shit together eventually!”
Anywho: Met up near where I live. I had 3 possible things I wanted to do but only 2 that could be done where we were meeting up. I got fun idea to try out – I kinda made it up as I went along. I said to her “ok close your eyes, now spin around! Spin!” so I got my finger on her forehead and she’s going around. Then I stop her, and I say “ok, in each direction lies a new adventure. I’ve mapped out the whole area! (In reality, there are two, and I wanted her to pick ONE) .
So she faces north at first, I’m like “oh, it’s just hard work and sweat over there” and she’s like ugh, turns east. I’m like “That way lies alcohol and merriment”, then south “long walks and nature” (it was a park) and then west “An, that way lies fun, creativity, and deliciousness!” obviously that’s the one she’s supposed to take. Haha. She chooses the booze. I explain to her if we go for booze, the other option won’t be avail later and she changes her mind. Yay.
I take her to this care that does good cakes, where there’s a poetry night starting at 9. I wanted to get there before so we could eat cake and talk etc. We do that, and then see some of the poetry. I listen to the first poet, and when the next one starts I whisper to her “after this poem, let’s fuck off!” and she’s like OK!
When we prepare to leave, I just put 2.50 on the table. She’s like “Is that enough?” and I said “I think It should be about 5 total” and then she puts some money down. Normally I flip for it (or do my other funny thing) but I just didn’t. I just assumed she’s pay for her half and that’s all. Moooooooooddddddde One lol. (Or is that mode 3?) :P
After that we hit a nice pub, near the park. The Question game ensues. You know, this fucking game never ceases to amaze me. I still learn more and more about women playing this ONE fucking game. It’s all I do on dates, that’s it. It’s so fucking good. I learned everything I needed pretty fast.setting up an easy lay. One of the things I realized (well, I guess not for the first time) was that women will tell you exactly what they want you to know (in order to best bed them) in this game. They WANT you to fuck them. They’re GIVING YOU the information you need to fuck them, in the game. This girl, she tells me, she doesn’t like it when a guy talks all the time, to fill up the silence. Guess what I was doing before this? I was talking too much. This was a REALLy clear message. Why tell me this? She wants to hookup. She’s saying “I want to fuck you, just shut up a bit”
I took the hint.
Other things about her: (She’s 25)
*She’s had 5 boyfriends, but hooked up with a total of 10 guys (this is NOT a lot considering how open she is about everything)
*she’s just come out of a 2 year relationship by the way
*Fastest she’s hooked up with someone – 2 dates (Never had a 1 night stand, or hooked up on a 1st date)
*Last time she had an orgasm was the night before all by herself! (standard question)
*Fantasies: Having a threesome with 2 guys and her, having a three some with a girl and a guy. She also said it’s hard to find 2 guys that are up for having a 3some with a girl. I was like “Uh, I think I couuld manage that swetie!” hahaha. I actually told her about some “Friends” of mine that have double banged chix and stuff. I failed to mention they were PUA’s :P
To her, moral character was an important factor. She was asking me what’s the worst thing I’d done etc.. but I really didn’t have much to tell her. I’ve done crazy shit, but not bad shit.
Anywho, that went on for about an hour.but it was time to move on. It really is important to keep things moving forward and switchin’ em up. This is something I’ve always noticed is massive for dates. You really do want to hit at least 3 different spots. Keep it fresh and exciting. After this we start walking.. now my PLAN originally was to take her to play frisbee in the dark, in the park (it rhymes!) but I realized there’s a kids playground RIGHT on the way to mine. We go in there and muck about the the swings. We went down a slide. “Wheee!” it’s just not the same as being a kid but it was fun. Then, we go into this hook thing. It’s above the ground, but you can just go in there and sit. You know what I mean? Anyways, we had isolation. Isolation in a kiddie park! It’s getting dodgy
Somewhere in this time I asked what her first impression was of me (or what her and her friend said after I left) and she said she didn’t remember – but earlier in the coffee shop she said she thought it was very balsy I’d just approached her on the street. While in the pub she’d said nobody had ever approached her in this manner before. I noted she must not hang around covent garden very much (you all know who you are!) :P
While in our little hut/playthingie, I ask her her “how’s our little date going so far” and she says “about a 7!” of course, I take the piss out of her for this answer.
I finally ask her “So, what are you looking for at this point.”
She says “I’m just looking to have some fun”
That means, uhh, sex for any of you that are just tuning in lol.
Very soon after this I ask “How good a kisser are you on a scale of 1-10?”
She says that’s hard to answer.
I stare at her. You could cut the sexual tension with a knife. IT’s been building up all night. And it’s time ..
I say “Only one way to find out.”
We make out for about a minute. She’s a good kisser. I tell her she’s about a 7.5
There’s a pause. There’s only one thing left to do at this point. We’ve talked. I know she’s up for it. We’ve had cake, listened to poetry, played the question game, played in a kid’s park, and made out. There’s nothing left to do except one thing.
I say “Want come back to my place and fuck?”
She says “I have to piss” .
I says “What about after the piss?”
She says “Maybe”
Sometimes a Maybe is a Maybe – but not in this case. That maybe was a “yes.” She’s been giving me sexy eyes all night. It’s ridiculous.
So, I take her back to the pub and she pees. There’s a dog with a furry tail. I pat it’s head. It’s a very big dog.
She comes out. I say “Hi” and I pull her in, and we make out heavy for like 2 mins in the pub I’m groping her. She body is very nice. I’m tell her how hard I am, and that I need a minute to calm down. I say “I think we should go back to mine now, I’ll give you an amazing massage, kiss and lick you all over, and then fuck the shit out of you!” and she agrees.
We walk back to mine. I say “hang on, so you haven’t been laid in 2 months!?” and she says “yeah!” and I’m like “Wow. Yea it’s about time!” she says “When’s the last time you got laid?… and then herself says “I guess it doesn’t matter” and I say “yeah.”
p.s – the correct answer to this question is usually 2 weeks. I tell the truth 99% of the time in this game (that’s why I always ask them first how many guys they’ve been with) but if you say “last night” it will KILL the mood. 2 weeks is good. Not too recent, but you’re not desperate either.
Anywho: we get to mine.. we have some water, and I tell her to get comfy on my bed and that I’ll be right back. I take my laptop with me to take a shit so I can find the playlist I want. Shitting and playlist organizing before a lay – now that’s good multi tasking.
I come back out she’s still mainly dressed I take her shirt off. And then trousers. And I get to massaging. Pretty much every time I took a piece of clothing off I said “I’m not hitting on you or anything it’s just for the massage” . Which was a running joke during the massage. Then when I started kissing/fingering her I’d say “ok, now I’m hitting on you” .
Anywho, she loved the full body massage. I was teasing her a lot. She noticed. I actually ran out towards then end just a minute to cut my nails (they were too long, and I didn’t want to hurt her as I knew I’d be fingering her!) .. I tired to make her orgasm using my fingers/mouth.. No good. We fucked. It got pretty hot in one or two points. She’d mentioned earlier she likes giving head but won’t give head without a condom to guys she doesn’t know. I still asked, but didn’t really push it. I was happy.
This girls body was magnificent. I’d say, near perfect for what I like. Amazing toned stomach, silky soft skin – super perky smallish/medium tits. Great ass. Everything. Body of a 21 year old. (Guess that’s not so amazing for a 25 year old but man it was amazing!)
I almost came twice. We had a break. I was planning on resuming but after some chat, she said she has to get home tonight. I was like “really?” but she had she to do in the morning, plus she said she doesn’t sleep well in other people’s beds. Fair enough. Normally it’s the guy who fucks off, or wants the girl to leave after sex. Role reversal!
I walker he to the Bus stop – it shows up ready away and she’s off!
Right. So. Yea. Before my date, I was actually thinking about this . You know how with some women, if you TELL them you’re going back for sex, they’ll say no. They can’t SAY or ADMIT they’re going to have sex with you – even if they know they intend to fuck. So, make guys (and me included) sometimes give some other reasons. To watch a movie. To see your pet fish. Whatever. And then u fuck. And some girls actually think they’re not going to sleep with you (tho they want to) but of course, they change their mind once you get them along and make a move, etc etc.
So –I was thinking about the application of mode one in this instance. What about the girls who just can’t admit they want sex? If you make it clear you want to fuck on a date, and then you say to a woman “let’s go back to mine” she KNOWS you’re going to try and fuck her. Wouldn’t this put some women off- certainly some girls that you’d have surely slept with had you just kept the reason. Less direct? I wanted to ask Alan about this before I went off on my date made a mental note to do so when I could.
So. With this girl here in particular, it wasn’t necessary for me to tell her I wanted to fuck her for the first 3ish hours of our date. IT was implied. I could tell she was there to hookup.
1) I told her she was hot when we met, and got her number
2) I’ve been trying to meet up with her, and she’s been trying to meet up with me
3) She’s here with me
4) She’s giving me sexy eyes
5) She’s single
If that wasn’t enough, she’s told me she just “Wants to have fun!”
Do I need any more of an indicator? I think it would have been uneccessary to just come out with “I wanna fuck you” randomly at any point during that first 3 hours. I was actually trying to get to know her. I knew we were going to fuck anyways. I was actually curious to get to know her/see how compatible we are to figure out whether this is just going to be a one night thing? Or do I actually connect with her enough to have something more?
I suppose I was building up enough comfort to have sex at the same time, and just enjoying myself. So a lot happened in those 3 hours.
But, my point is this: When the time came to be clear about what I wanted then I was. When she said “What did you expect when you approached me” I said I wanted to get her number, meetup, and fuck her.
After we kisses, and I knew it was time to escalate, I just said we should go and fuck and that’s it. But, THAT was the right time to verbalize it – when it was time to go and do it.
Anywho- so my realization for tonight is You can be mode one without verbalizing it constantly (or, even at all – on a date) if you’ve made it clear from the start and things are moving towards sex – you don’t have to talk about it all the time. In fact, I can see it coming off as weird/creepy/needy. If she knows that’s what you’re after – just assume it’s on and that’s it. If a woman ever asks “What do you want to happen tonight” or “what do you think’s going to happen tonight” tell them exactly what you want. “I want to seduce you, bring you back to mine, and give you the time of your life” . Or whatever. Just say it. THAT’s mode one baby – not backing down when it’s time to step up.
I think I get it.
Just like, it wasn’t really necessary going into the whole “I just want to have fun / don’t believe in monogamy blah blah blah” routine because it just felt like we were on the same wavelength. Why bother with all that?
I asked her afterwords if she thought we were going to hookup that night and she said “I didn’t think about it – girls don’t think about that kind of stuff”
Anywho – I just text her “Hey, you’re a cool broad! I hope u stay in touch even though u got what you “really wanted” on the first date. :D I’d be interested in introducing you to this one very sexy girl I know I think the 3 of us might play well together.”
Moooooooooddddde Onnnnnnnnnnneeeeeeeeeeee (when necessary) lol