…That means she thinks you’re an asshole!
An interesting thing I’ve found is, some girls that clearly like you will not give you their number because it is simply an automatic response to all these losers asking for their number. (Often as an opening line!) A “no” from a girl about getting their number is pretty much an automatically generated response. Yes, sometimes it means they just don’t like you enough to give you their number – but not always.
Assuming there is enough interest/comfort for them to want to give you their number- the key to get past this auto response mechanism is to get their number without directly asking for their number.
(If there’s enough attraction/comfort really this shouldn’t be an issue, but sometimes it still happens…)
Essentially – You need to get their number without actually asking for it. But, even before we get to that, to increase your chances of getting her number, have more comfort! Try and go for longer conversations. Shoot for 20 minutes but at least 10. Get them to invest, talk a lot about themselves. If they haven’t invested, there’s no reason to see you again. (No, sex isn’t usually a reason, but sometimes it can be.)
Sometimes you can meet a girl, decide you’re going to meet up for sex and they won’t flake. But, many conditions have to be in play. You have to be very sure of yourself during this interaction. You have to project a sexual vibe. The girl has to be quite open and in most cases you’d have had to build enough trust where she’s comfortable meeting you for sex. But, unless you are at a reasonably advanced level, you will not be meeting a girl for prearranged sex on the first date.
That being said, your best strategy is:
Make a date with her and just exchange numbers in case someone is late. This is called a “time bridge.” You should always strive to do this as it is extremely effective. Partially, It’s a good idea to get her to commit to actual plans instead of the wishy-washy “let’s meet up sometime” or “I’ll give you a call sometime.” How many times do you think they’ve heard that and had a guy not call? Plenty. By making specific plans you really strengthen the reality that you two are going to meet up.
Furthermore, it’s a lot more socially awkward for her to cancel it (especially after you qualify her on being the type of person that goes through with things) than it is to just show up, even if she’s not sure. Girls want to avoid feelings of awkwardness. So, if her fear of the date being awkward is about a 5 on a scale of 1 to 10, and her fear of awkwardness for cancelling on you is a 7 – it’s easier just to show up and see what happens.
If she likes you but is saying “ooh uuhh, I dunno,” I like to slip in one of the following lines. “I promise not to call you 25 times a day,” or “I’m already stalking 3 girls, I don’t have time for another!” These are lovely little lines I used to use all the time back when I was starting out. I’ll still throw them in here and there but they get less necessary as your game improves. A quick laugh raises their state and puts them at ease – generally enough to get the number.
Note: If you have to use one of these lines to get her number, she’s more likely to flake on you than if you didn’t.
This next little addition is probably the best one out there for getting a girls number. I didn’t come up with the overall concept, but the hilarious lines are of course 100% Sasha ™
Just say “ok, let me put my number in your phone in case you’re late (or if without a date planned so she can call you when she’s doing something fun,” but then say “I only answer when I know who’s calling – so I’ll just give myself a missed call” and dial yourself. That’s the 100% way to get their number. I don’t actually like being that forceful (and calling myself from their phone kinda feels like cheating: I’ll just say “hey, give me a missed call so I know who’s calling. I have an ex GF who’s still stalking me so…”
It would be weird pulling this move if she’s already refused to give her number, as assuming she’s not retarded she’d know what you’re up to. My solution for this: Simply get her number this way every time. Don’t even ask for their number! It’s literally fool-proof. I honestly can’t remember a time a girl said “oh no, I don’t feel comfortable you having my number. Once a girl gave me a funny look and said “ah, nice move” or something but that’s it. Then she still gave me her number. Maybe one other time it didn’t work but I can’t remember it as works virtually ALL the time. If you want to break down why this works so effectively – not only are you bypassing their “no” auto-mechanism – you’re really using compliance to your advantage:
When you say “take my number, put it in your phone” … of course she agrees. Who wouldn’t? It’s harmless for THEM to have YOUR number. However: once she’s already accepted that some sort of number exchange is taking place she’s already accepted that she’s interested in some way. She’s complied. So it’s a very small further step for her to just press talk on her phone so you have her number as well.
Cha-ching. Money baby!
Now, there’s only one thing better that meeting a girl, getting her number, making a date and then meeting up with her in the future – and that is … (drum roll)
Going for a date with her right then!
So many guys don’t even have the “insta-date” in their repertoire. What gives?
Why are you making plans to see a girl later who is at the moment, standing right in front of you? What are you, stupid?
Hey, are you spontaneous? Cool – what are you doing right now? Pff, you can do that later. Let’s go get a cup of tea. You’re buying!”
“Hey, do you like adventures? Awesome. Let’s go for a walk and see if we can have some fun!”
Simple, isn’t it? Suffice to say, if you hand around with a girl for an hour and show her a great time, the above paragraphs will be totally unnecessary. She’ll want to give you her number to see you again anyways.
If you’d like to learn more about instant dates, I’ve got a blog post and an accompanying video about ’em here: How to get instant dates
This works, I ain’t kidding! Master these simple concepts and you will (at the very least) have a phone full of girls who won’t return your phone calls. Hahaha – and at best, you’ll be able to go out there, instant date a girl and bring her right back to your bedroom! (no, I’m not going to cover THAT part in this article. Suckers!!) :P
Good luck, and happy gaming!